CM Punk
Pipe bombs, walkouts, and Pepsi: satirical CM Punk news. 193 stories, 2012–2024.
WWE signs Toronto mayor as new monster heel
Cool Make-A-Wish kid planning to somehow re-injure Cena
Orton performs variation of “Go To Sleep” by talking
CM Punk accidentally left out of PWI 500
CM Punk comes out as gay-edge
Walrus attacks wolverine
Punk intends to defeat Lesnar with grammar quiz
Punk and Heyman have amazing make-up sex
Pro wrestling a “fake sport for rednecks,” says NASCAR fan
CM Punk seeks restraining order against all wrestling fans
CM Punk unaware there’s a pay-per-view Sunday
Bo Dallas envies Curtis Axel’s “long-term success”
Twitter bans all professional wrestlers: “That’s enough,” says social media giant
Jericho gets revenge by forcing Fandango to listen to Fozzy
Winning streak in jeopardy for magical middle-aged zombie who wears eyeliner
CM Punk hopes WrestleMania will be a stepping stone to TNA
The Rock exhausted from countless title defences at WWE house shows
Man shot in the brain suddenly becomes a fan of The Rock
Man shoots himself in other eye to avoid seeing Rock-Cena rematch
BREAKING NEWS: Royal Rumble match to be replaced by hour-long “Rock Concert”
Contract typo leads to Royal Rumble showdown between CM Punk and Don “The Rock” Muraco
Hostess saved from closure by The Rock’s on-air endorsement of Twinkie Tits
Paul Heyman to record cover of The Beatles’ “I Am the Walrus”
